The Fullness of the Emptiness

Happy Birthday dear Akshay, you would have been 21 years old today here on Earth. You get a nebulous feeling on these special days of your loved ones, when they are no longer with you. These lines penned by Jeff Foster beautifully capture that feeling. 

                                   

If you are exhausted, rest 

If you don't feel like starting a new project,  don't

If you don't feel the urge to make something new 

Just rest in the beauty of the old, the familiar and the known

If you don't feel like talking, stay silent

If you are fed up with the news, turn it off

If you want to postpone something until tomorrow, do it

If you want to do nothing today, let yourself do nothing

Feel the fullness of the emptiness,

The vastness of the silence,

The sheer life in your unproductive moments,

Time does not always need to be filled,

You are enough simply in your being.

The Shine of Truth

 An inspirational line relevant for our times taken from the writings of Nanaji, Akshay's maternal grandfather. He used to write regularly on spiritual matters for Tapovan Prasad, a magazine from Chinmaya Mission. Akshay was born a month after he passed away this day in 2001. Remembering Nanaji fondly on his 21st anniversary.  

The Beauty in the Bleakness

 As one more pandemic stricken year comes to a close, we mark ten years without Akshay. Its been a chaotic year no doubt, glad its getting over. See I even missed posting on Akshay's birthday in March. But there's beauty in the bleakness, almost as if God is whispering in our ears to look at the splendour of his Creation and add to it in whatever way we can. Just as Akshay did in his short life. 

It was Archy's birthday yesterday, he turned eleven. There was a pretty cake, but it didn't seem to interest our furry friend much. Look how he gives a grateful look for the birthday song. Amazingly human!

Up in the skies, today is an eventful day. Five planets are lining up and will be visible to the naked eye. Five twinkling stars, all in a row specially for Akshay to watch from wherever he is. 

The day Akshay was consigned to flames was Bahrain National Day, and the whole nation was decked up in lights - a grand farewell for Akshay. God's ways are mysterious aren't they? 

Always in our heart

Miss you, love you dearest Akshay. 

All of nine years now without you. 

The world has been in the grip of Covid -19 pandemic for nine months now, 

masked, sanitised, socially distanced and quarantined. It's as if humanity is in a kiln. Let's hope a something good comes out after all the roasting!

 

Time Unspools into Space

Eight years ago Akshay let go of his body. Time is a combination of past, present and future. The past is in our heads, and the future in our hands. Einstein once said,' I never think of the future, it comes soon enough.' These pictures from the past are glimpses of happier days. This going back and forth brings the awareness that we must accept death as a part of life and not the end of life.

The Pieces of the Puzzle

Life is a puzzle, just like love. There are so many pieces that are needed to complete the picture. Thank you Akshay for being a piece of our lives for ten years. Our lives are incomplete without you. You would have been eighteen today in your Earth life.

The Other Side of Pain

How do we get on the other side of pain? I came across this very visceral description of grief by Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat, Pray, Love.She says, "Grief is a force of energy that cannot be controlled or predicted. It comes and goes on its own schedule. Grief does not obey your plans, or your wishes. Grief will do whatever it wants to you, whenever it wants to. In that regard, Grief has a lot in common with love.” Grief happens upon you, it’s bigger than you. There is a humility that you have to step into, where you surrender to being moved through the landscape of grief by grief itself. And it has its own time frame, it has its own itinerary with you, it has its own power over you, and it will come when it comes. And when it comes, it’s a bow-down. It’s a carve-out. And it comes when it wants to, and it carves you out — it comes in the middle of the night, comes in the middle of the day, comes in the middle of a meeting, comes in the middle of a meal. It arrives — it’s this tremendously forceful arrival and it cannot be resisted without you suffering more… The posture that you take is you hit your knees in absolute humility and you let it rock you until it is done with you. And it will be done with you, eventually. And when it is done, it will leave. But to stiffen, to resist, and to fight it is to hurt yourself.